This is my 5th day alone in Costa Rica. Time sure flies when you're doing nothing! I am really loving the feeling of not HAVING to do anything.

Fortunately, my tendency to be a hermit goes along with my intent for this trip; to spend time working on my website and to work on healing myself. As remote as this place is, there always seems to be someone here doing maintenance of some sort. That can be nice so I don't feel so secluded, but it also interrupts my privacy. I have had to put a bra on way more than I'd like! LOL

Yesterday, the property manager's worker, David, came over to spray the giant wasps again and to change out a few light bulbs. Today David brought over a guy that speaks English and says "today I am going to clean your yard." Okay, sure. I must say it's really nice! It's a bit odd living like an expat and I'm not entirely comfortable with the separation between "us" and the locals, but it's interesting and feels a bit posh.

Ha ha so it turns out that this guy cleaning up the yard is yet another one of David's 6 brothers. Lynn and I met his brother Freddy last week while he was collecting coconuts on the beach. They are all very friendly and it's nice to chat with them and practice my Spanish but I'm trying to make sure the line is quite clear that even though i'm a woman alone, that a) I have a husband at home (boyfriend, whatever, same same) and b) that I'm not interested in any extra curricular activities! One of the first things this guy asked me was if I had a husband. He offered to take me to the surfer beach and I would really like to ask him if I could tag along to go to Paso Canoas (the town on the Panamanian border where everyone buys less expensive groceries) with him on Saturday, but it all seems like it would be inappropriate. But I could really use some more wine! LOLLast night was pitch dark again (David turned off the neighboring house's outside light when he was in there doing maintenance) and the raccoon tried to get in the kitchen screen again! This time it didn't freak me out nearly as much since I knew what it was, although it's still not fun being woken up in the middle of the night by something trying to get in your house! I yelled at it and it didn't come back the rest of the night.

There was also a break in the clouds so there were stars last night! I went down in the yard to look at them for a bit but I have to admit that I'm still a bit wary of what might be crawling around out there after dark.

I have had some interesting dreams about both Mom and Cynthia that also wake me up in the middle of hte night so I am not getting much sleep. But the beauty of being alone her and the free feeling of not HAVING to do anything is wonderful. I can nap any time of day, be lazy, work, not work, read, stroll to the beach even if only for a moment. No guilt, no stress, no expectations.

I am trying really hard to not put any expectations on myself either. I know I'm not very good at getting out there by myself so if I stay around the house, so be it. I mean hanging out here enjoying the tropical birds and iguanas doesn't exactly suck.